Life changing events

Me riding Remix. 

 

As I write this on the 5th anniversary of me falling off my horse and breaking my back in two places, I expected myself to be writing about that event. However, though it was an event which caused many problems, I am not sure I can say it was life changing. Yes I missed out on an all expenses paid trip to Las Vegas (Hubby has never forgiven me for that). Yes it meant months of recovery and years before I felt like me again. But was it life changing? Did that day mean my subsequent life was forever different? Not really. It was an inconvenience, but not life changing.

So why the title, well I thought I would talk about an event that happened in my life that was life changing. I am not talking about the obvious expected ones, getting married, having kids etc. I am talking about those unexpected events which you hadn’t planned but did change you. I also expect that some of those events are not necessarily obvious to you or even that you realised the impact they had on your life. But they did change your life for better or for worse. I am of the philosophy that things happen for a reason. We might not like the events that unfold, but as one door closes another opens. I am quite optimistic in life.

The life changing event happened to me when I was just 16 years old. A few of my friends reading this may remember it. I got my first paid job in the summer of 1985. I had finished my O-levels and went down to the local Iceland and asked if they had any work for the summer. I started the next day on the shop floor and the till. At the end of the week I received my first little brown envelope with my hard earned cash in it. Over the summer I saved the money as I wanted to join my friends the following April on the school organised canal trip at Easter. I booked on the trip, I think it was about £88 and looked forward to being apart of the adventure. 

Rare picture of my with both thumbs. 

The first night we moored up and we went to the local pub. I was sick in the toilet, though not from drinking. I thought this was a great start to the adventure. The next day saw us approaching the long stretch of the canal which was lock after lock. I jumped off the boat at one of the locks grabbed the rope and looped it over the stone bollard. The boat was still moving forward and it pulled the rope tight. At this point I realised that my thumb was caught between the rope and bollard. The boat was pulling and twisting the rope. I screamed, but was too late. The rope scraped the top my thumb from the bottom. The boat was slammed into reverse and I was able to get my hand free.

Staff and friends ran towards me as I held my hand, screaming in agony. The first teacher to reach me only saw the red of my fingerless gloves and thought I had lost my whole hand. I think she was quite relieved that it was only the top of my thumb that was hanging loose. The most remarkable thing was that even though we were on a very long deserted stretch of canal there was one house next to the lock. This turned out to be the local doctors house. Though he wasn’t home his wife was, who knew exactly what to do. I was rushed to the local cottage hospital. I remember that I was most annoyed that had to cut off my clothes, including my jeans I had saved up and bought.

I spent a week in Birmingham accident hospital after they had sewn my thumb back on. It was strange that there was another person called Lois opposite me in the hospital. You never meet many Lois’s. Unfortunately she died during my stay. My mum travelled by coach (we didn’t have a car), to visit me. When she arrived I threw up all over her. This was when I found out that anaesthetics do not agree with me. My thumb did not survive and I spent another week in a burns specialist hospital in Essex having my thumb removed. 

Most people don’t notice my thumb. I had known my hubby for months before he did. But for me it was life changing and in more ways than I ever knew then. I was doing my A-levels at the time, maths, geography and textile and dress. Having the ability to grasp things with our fingers and thumbs is one of our uniquenesses and for sewing it is a fundamental skill. I had plans to be a fashion designer. I had visited the London College of Fashion and wanted to go there. But loosing my thumb shattered my confidence. I was not the same after that. 

It is not like today where mental health and wellbeing and post traumatic stress are well known and support provided. I received compensation for my accident through the school travel insurance, but I had no counselling or support for the long term impact. I know it was only a very small part of my body I lost, but it did have an affect on me. One I never recognised until many years later. Two months after the accident I was expected to sit exams in my lower sixth. The following year I sat my A-levels. I flunked these, including my textiles and dress A-level. The one thing I had always felt I was good at.

Here is one I have made!!

As with most life changing events, I can’t look back and say what if. The insurance money I got, paid for my driving lessons. My parents would never have been able to afford these. So one positive is I learnt to drive at the age of 17. Secondly, I eventually went to university to study maths, statistics and computing. This opened many doors. I met my future husband.I was introduced to the company that we both worked for and was successful in. It gave me a love for maths I never lost and eventually trained to become a maths teacher. So I can safely say that for me those events in April 1986 were life changing. Not just because I lost my thumb, which has come in handy for many a joke, but because of the way that that event changed my path. I still make my own clothes and have passed on my passion for designing and making clothes to my daughters. I made my own wedding dress, bridesmaids dresses and waistcoats. Maybe there is still time for me to be a fashion designer. You never know, watch this space.